Why Would I Want to Stick Out More by Being the Best? (Advice for Coaching Women Part 1).

Why would I want to stick out MORE by being the best?” 

....Said no man EVER (okay I’m exaggerating).

But if you coach women, you know what I’m talking about. Your female athletes don’t necessarily say this out loud, but their subconscious brain is SCREAMING it at them daily.

You see it in their performance; they play down to their teammates, don't take the last shot even though they are most likely to make it (is it fear of failure or fear of success?), don't score ‘too much’, play a great game or great half and then self-sabotage by playing down to a lower level of performance.

I know a little bit about this. I always wanted to be the best. And yet even I felt at a very young age the social COST of being the best. And it made me change my performance.

I stuck out on my high school team, I was from a different part of town, I was higher socioeconomically than many of my teammates, I was the arguably the best player as a...

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Why Reframing Fear is One of Your Most Powerful Coaching Tools

You know the feeling. Your hands are sweaty. Your stomach is in knots and you may or may not have to pee like 5 times. Your heart is racing, and you cannot wait for this feeling to go away.

Logically, you know you are not in danger. It’s just a job interview, first date, game, public speaking, or difficult conversation. But your brain isn’t really listening to that argument. Yes, you are safe, but you just don’t feel like it.

Ahhh the fight or flight response. That glorious, automatic reaction of our sympathetic nervous system that has kept our species alive for 200,000 years (give or take). The response that works beautifully when necessary, but inconveniently comes to visit during seemingly innocuous situations like first dates or presentations.

We’ve all been there. And for most of us, we want to stop feeling that way immediately.

Our bodies are literally screaming at us to rectify the situation, change SOMETHING.

But what if the thing we really...

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Are You Doing This DAILY (and with detail)? The Importance of Visualization

"I’ve been visualizing ever since I was 12 or 13 when my amazing mother introduced me to it," Bianca Andreescu said. "I find it very helpful ... I believe we create our reality with our mind."

No big deal, she just won the U.S. Open at 19 years old, defeating 23 time Grand Slam winner Serena Williams.

YOU know visualization is a powerful mental training tool for athletes. You may already be implementing it with your team, maybe by utilizing our popular BRAVR™ Method.

But I want to take a moment and REALLY talk about visualization. 

In my humble opinion, visualization is the single best tool for getting your subconscious brain aligned with what you are working toward. When you fail to do this, hard work doesn't mean as much as it should. You can easily work and work and work and self-sabotage every step of the way without even knowing it.

That’s why, when I work with athletes, I teach them to visualize. When I work with mindset...

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How to Get Anything You Want with The TEARâ„¢ Process

I see it all the time. I start working with a client and suddenly they are able to:

  • Lose 50 lbs despite the fact that I don’t teach ANYTHING about fitness or weight loss
  • Quit smoking after YEARS of trying despite the fact that I know nothing about any smoking cessation tactics.
  • Start 100k businesses after years of thinking about it.
  • Go from crying and wanting to quit their sport to playing their best in a few weeks.

Am I just really good at what I do?  

Well yes, but I’m not a magicianAs I tell my mindset coaching students, what we do is NOT heal people or get people to another level or pull out better performances; what we do is hold a space for them to find that in themselves. Now, this isn’t EASY to do. I will give us credit for that. But the work is done by the client. We don’t FIX them, we help them find the solutions inside them, to trust the path they’ve been scared to want; we help them step into another level with a steadying...

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Are You Winning or Losing (in life)?

I remember being at a wedding in my mid 20s. At the time, I was still playing professionally, living 8 months of the year abroad and getting paid to play a game I would gladly play for free. It was in many ways a dream life. It was challenging in many other ways that I won’t go into here but it was simple in one distinct way; I knew every single day if I had won or lost.

At this wedding, I was talking to a former collegiate and professional basketball player I knew, 8 months pregnant with her 3rd child. She said the hardest thing about the real world was not knowing what success really was. I understood what she meant, one of my favorite things about sports was the sometimes instant gratification of hard work or at least the instant feedback of what was working and what wasn’t.

And I see this SO much with myself and clients. When we don’t see results, and we aren’t even sure what results we are looking for, things can get confusing. After all, there...

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Is it Real Fear or Fake Fear?

 I went skydiving one time. It wasn’t my idea. I was doing a summer internship and my boss surprised me with a skydiving day. We drove out to a hangar in the middle of Iowa cornfields. And he said, “it’s paid for, you can do it or not.”

So, I jumped. I knew I would never have another opportunity like that.

I’ve done other scary things- I’ve ran faster than I’d ever ran before, I’ve lifted weights I wasn’t sure I could do. I’ve swung from a trapeze 50 feet in the air. I’ve gone ziplining over the jungle.

But I’m not really an adrenaline junkie. I look at people that take serious physical risks (ummmm like Free Solo??? Don’t even get me started on the riskiness of some people) and I’m not one of them. I like to PUSH myself physically but setting yourself up for getting hurt is a whole other ballgame. I always say there is real fear and there is FAKE fear.

(And then there is the middle area of...

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The 'AS IF' Mindset Hack

A few years ago I started learning about emotional labeling and it sort of blew my mind. Not the principle of it- it’s exactly what it sounds like… you identify your emotions and label them. But you do it in a way that doesn’t make you feel like you ARE the emotion. So instead of saying I’m stressed, or I’m sad, you say I FEEL sad or I FEEL stressed.

Which is a pretty awesome tool because it helps you recognized that, although it feels like it, we are not ACTUALLY our emotions. Emotions are based on our thoughts, our thoughts we have the power to change.

But I digress. What got me about this particularly mindset hack is that it’s so freaking SIMPLE! I wondered why I failed to learn about it until I was 30. But isn’t that the case with a lot of these tools- we FINALLY find the ones that work for us and we think ‘why did no one tell me this before?’

I was listening to a podcast this morning about emotional labeling which got my...

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Why Successful People Pay for Mentorship

 

It’s easy to assume that because you HAVE support in your life that it’s the RIGHT support. Most of the time, I'd venture to say the support we have on an everyday basis is enough for doing what we are doing NOW. But if we are trying to get to another level, trying to break through to something bigger and bolder, the support structure around us is like the scaffolding needed to build a higher building. It has to rise for us to build higher.

Because here is the thing: There is the ‘I love you, I believe in you and your big goals’ type of support. And there is the “You can push yourself way more and I’ll support you every step of the way.” And it’s really hard for people to serve both types of support consistently. Yes, my husband can kick my butt at times (and definitely does) but EVERY time we sit down for a glass of wine, do I REALLY want him in that role? Does he want to be in that role all the time? Of course not.

...

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Coaches: If There Was ONLY One Tool I Could Teach You, This Would Be It.

 

This video was originally streamed on Facebook Live. Watch the video, and/or read the brief synopsis below to learn about the most powerful mental training tool you should be teaching your athletes. 


I get some variation on this question from coaches a lot:

Lindsey, which mindset tool will help my coaching and my athletes the most? 

My answer? 

The greatest all-around tool that can truly benefit everyone on your team (including you) is visualization. 

If you follow this blog, you've likely heard me mention visualization before (most recently, here, and here). Today, I'm going to keep it simple and talk about how visualization can help you really get through to your athletes. 

What is Visualization?

Visualization is a method in which you imagine a storyline. This enables you to experience something on a deeply emotional level without posing any real risk.

Learn more about the scientific research behind visualization in our previous blog, The Top 5...

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Struggling with PreGame Nerves? Do These 2 Things

 

In my opinion there is nothing more important than pre-competition mindset work. After all, if you can't show what you can do when the lights come on, who really cares about anything else? Game time is show time. 

It's also where many athletes get hung up. In fact, I would say that dealing with pre-game nerves is one of the biggest differences between elite athletes and everyone else. 

Elite athletes believe that nerves are a PART of peak performance. Everyone else thinks that pre-game nerves are something to be avoided. 

So what to do if your athletes are struggling with pre-game nerves? Do these 2 things. 


If you want to make a BIG impact teaching athletes the mental game, THIS is the next step.

Join us for our FREE, 1-hour masterclass for coaches: Game Face: Inside The Minds of Great Competitors.

In this webinar, you’ll learn:

  • The mental component that separates good athletes from great athletes
  • How to help your athletes crush their self-imposed...
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